There are some humans out there who call themselves "Catholics," who are members of the religion "Catholicism," (kind of an obvious association, unlike Dutch and Netherlands...that doesn't make any sense) and these people have Lent. Basically they have to give up things that cause them temptation such as chocolate (a sweet thing made of beans...kind of an odd bean, sugar, milk combination), coffee (another bean, but sugar isn't necessarily added), and alcohol (something even Ambis have). These Catholics have to give them up for a number of days.
It seems kind of silly, but I decided to try it myself. I figured it is impossible for me to do. I do not eat or drink and I have a long lasting internal power source. What is there for me to give up? The only thing I ingest is various forms of lubricants...oil now that I'm on Earth. (Paul has some clear liquid in his drawer that says "lubricant," but it tastes nasty.) I've been known to use blood (don't ask how I came upon this). Well, I read my owner's manual and realized: I can't give this up for Lent. First of all, I don't ingest it very often, and second...if I don't, I can't move very well after a while. My joints start to rub against each other. Not a pretty picture.
Well, the only other thing would be to give up Jix. I don't see how that is possible. She's everywhere. I go into the bedroom and she comes in to take a nap or build something (at least when she does that, she changes into Lamerix and she's not as cute with the goggles) I go into the living room and she's playing video games with Dyona, Lauren, and/or Paul. Not that I'm complaining, but for a droid who is infatuated, it's not exactly easy to "quit her" as a gay cowboy would put it. Of course, there are the two Ambis ships cloaked in Central Park that I could go and stay in, but the less we go into them, the less the humans in Central Park will wonder about it.
So there you go, the experiment is a failure. I guess if I ingested more things on a regular basis or if I looked at nude pictures of the opposite sex (which is kind of impossible considering droids don't technically have genders). Well...there are the pictures of Jix I took...uh...never mind.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Pregnancy is a bitch or: da bitch be pregnant
The human "Lauren" is pregnant.
Jix and Lauren have both assured me it's not another parasite. I have to say: I'm kind of relieved that they told me because I'm sure they'd both be crying if I did the same thing to whatever came out of Jix. I'm also kind of bummed out. I haven't had the chance to kill anything in a while...unless you count The Planet Thief, but I don't because he came back and I got my old body all destroyed and everything.
So from what I understand, there's a smaller human growing inside of Lauren's stomach. I'm not sure how it got there or where it's coming out, but it scares the living hell out of me. First off: Lauren is scary. Anything coming out of her must be scary, too...assuming it's sentient. I can't imagine poo being all that scary.
None of this is hygienic, which is why I'm glad I'm not biological and why I'm glad I'm completely sealed off. Dyona and some of the older android bodies aren't completely sealed and they tend to get some dust and such in them.
Don't tell her, though, she'll want a new body, too.
Androids are more efficient, though: we're built in a clean factory. There are no slimy, bloody bits in us (unless we ate a biological creature or unless you happen to be a cyborg...not sure what the difference is...) and we certainly don't get moody when we replicate.
Okay...I got a little blood on the floor, but she didn't have to yell at me. She might have been a little nicer if it wasn't her blood, but I still blame her rant on her pregnancy. Reason is...she started crying after that.
I've been told my old owner is pregnant, too, but I don't remember my old owner very well. I seem to remember a gold plated bounty hunter, but beyond that is damaged data that didn't fully transfer over. If memory serves (and it usually doesn't), the bounty hunter was a guy. I know Ambis physiology (enough to dissect one properly, anyway) and I know the males aren't the ones that carry the baby...or lay the eggs...hmm...can't remember which. Do Ambis lay eggs? Anyway, I'm not entirely sure how my old owner is "with child" as I'm fairly certain my last owner was male.
By the way, I've noticed these lumps on Lauren's chest before, but they were never this big and since her pregnancy, they seem to have gotten bigger. I think she may have chest tumors...except...other female humans seem to have them, too, but not female Ambis.
I have noticed the human Paul staring at them quite intensely at times, but not so much that he's afraid of them as he's either curious or very interested in them. Maybe female humans are supposed to have tumors in their chests.
Jix and Lauren have both assured me it's not another parasite. I have to say: I'm kind of relieved that they told me because I'm sure they'd both be crying if I did the same thing to whatever came out of Jix. I'm also kind of bummed out. I haven't had the chance to kill anything in a while...unless you count The Planet Thief, but I don't because he came back and I got my old body all destroyed and everything.
So from what I understand, there's a smaller human growing inside of Lauren's stomach. I'm not sure how it got there or where it's coming out, but it scares the living hell out of me. First off: Lauren is scary. Anything coming out of her must be scary, too...assuming it's sentient. I can't imagine poo being all that scary.
None of this is hygienic, which is why I'm glad I'm not biological and why I'm glad I'm completely sealed off. Dyona and some of the older android bodies aren't completely sealed and they tend to get some dust and such in them.
Don't tell her, though, she'll want a new body, too.
Androids are more efficient, though: we're built in a clean factory. There are no slimy, bloody bits in us (unless we ate a biological creature or unless you happen to be a cyborg...not sure what the difference is...) and we certainly don't get moody when we replicate.
Okay...I got a little blood on the floor, but she didn't have to yell at me. She might have been a little nicer if it wasn't her blood, but I still blame her rant on her pregnancy. Reason is...she started crying after that.
I've been told my old owner is pregnant, too, but I don't remember my old owner very well. I seem to remember a gold plated bounty hunter, but beyond that is damaged data that didn't fully transfer over. If memory serves (and it usually doesn't), the bounty hunter was a guy. I know Ambis physiology (enough to dissect one properly, anyway) and I know the males aren't the ones that carry the baby...or lay the eggs...hmm...can't remember which. Do Ambis lay eggs? Anyway, I'm not entirely sure how my old owner is "with child" as I'm fairly certain my last owner was male.
By the way, I've noticed these lumps on Lauren's chest before, but they were never this big and since her pregnancy, they seem to have gotten bigger. I think she may have chest tumors...except...other female humans seem to have them, too, but not female Ambis.
I have noticed the human Paul staring at them quite intensely at times, but not so much that he's afraid of them as he's either curious or very interested in them. Maybe female humans are supposed to have tumors in their chests.
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